Thursday, September 8, 2011

Personal Post...need to get things off my chest.

The past 5 years have been really hard on my family, close family and friends know why. I don't feel like posting the reasons why things have been hard on my blog mostly because it would honestly take me forever. I will just say that my pain and fear comes from my twin sister. She has chosen to live on the streets and its tearing me up. my whole family is totally broken. We didn't know where she was or what she was doing. Today has been a really hard day for me so Joe forced me out of the house to go to the mall to get my mind off of her. We walked into target and there she was, returning stolen items to receive store credit. My heart broke when I saw her. Part of me was relieved that she wasn't dead but the other part wanted to explode. She was covered in dirt and didn't look well at all. Do you have any idea how it feels like to see your homeless twin sister? It took every ounce of strength to not break down and cry in front of her. I wanted her to think I was fine even though I'm not. I'm not fine at all. I can't eat, sleep, or even think right now. The only reason I get out of bed every day is because of my two boys and husband. Joe is trying his hardest to comfort me but it's hard because he just doesn't get what I'm going through. I guess there is nothing I can really do but pray that she will be safe and protected, and that she will some day want the help she needs. I hope I can try and get through this with out having a mental breakdown (which is soon coming). I am thankful for my wonderful family and friends to help me through this really sucky time. I just really miss my sister.
Mal on the left and I'm on the right

5 comments:

Unknown said...

Sending prayers your way. Hugs.

Anonymous said...

I can't even imagine how painful this must be for you and your family. I feel so blessed to have you in our family. I wish I could take away the hurt and fear that this situation is putting into your life. I pray that things will change for your sister, and also that you and your parents have the strength and endurance to make it through this time. With love, Sandy

Anonymous said...

I wish I was able to talk to you more. I can't believe you and your family are going through this, how much pain you all are going through. I wish I was tehre to help you with the boys. I'm glad that Joe is there & all your family! I am so blessed to have gotten to know you and become really good friends with you. I wish I didnt have to live so far away!! I'm praying for things to get better for Mal, and you and your family can get through this! Love you guys & miss you all alot!
-Stuarts

Alisha and Braeden said...

You are in my prayers Mandy

Brenda said...

I stopped at your blog and was very touched at your story. I don't know what it feels like to have a twin, but my aunts were twins (one passed recently). I watched them as I grew up, noticing that every move they made were the same. They loved dressing alike, even up to the day one passed away. I remember always wanting a sister like that. (I have two brothers, no sisters.) I can say that you and your sister will be in my prayers. And I do pray there is something than can turn her around. Brenda